I’m going to go on the paleo diet I think. The human body hasn’t adapted to eat the processed foods that are shoved down our throats today. Ya know, flour, milk, etc.

For millions of years we were hunter/gatherers and we were doing just fine. But as a modern man I honestly can’t even remember the last time I tracked and killed an impala for dinner. I’m ashamed to say I keep my leftovers at or below 4ºC to slow the growth of pathogens, reducing disease and food wastage. What a wimp I be.

So I will live like the cavemen did. Not to lose weight, not to be healthier, but because I want to die when I’m 33.