Why Cheating Happens

This is part one of a two-part series* on how infidelity comes to pass**.

Disclaimer up front, the love of my life has a bit of experience in the cheating arena (what with the husband and all) and neither of my theories apply to her experiences. So… do with that what you may.

Part One: Chicks.

I may have rambled about this in the past, but you must understand how the brain works with regards to models. Car analogy, why not: you come from a little island to a big city for the first time. Lots of stuff you’re unfamiliar with. You see a bunch of four-wheeled metal machines and hear them referred to as cars. Your brain now has a model for ‘car’. If you see something, even a car you’ve never seen before, your clever little brain will see if it fits the model it has for ‘car’. If your brain deems it close enough, it will tell you you’re looking at a car. As you come across more and more cars, if you’re interested, you may begin to notice ‘sports cars’, or ‘SUVs’. You can continue to branch these models into more and more specific models. This is what becoming an expert in something is. This is why some people see ‘old sports car’ and some people see ‘1972 Porsche 911 2.7’. I have one model for ‘tree’, one for ‘shrub’, etc. My Grandma, god rest her soul*, has hundreds of models. This one has about a million.

It’s also why some people see an ‘Asian’ and some see a ‘Korean’. If you’re seeing North Koreans then you’re either in the wrong place or you’re right where you are now and it’s 2022*.

A little aside: I’m miserable today, writing is helping.

We should get to the cheating. Let’s imagine for a moment I was the type to have a person who was in my life on some sort of constant basis. Shudder. I would see her in the day and in the night. By candle light and with the sick fluorescent light shimmering on her skin***. Through short hair and long, blonde and brunette, makeup and no. Onesies and ballgowns, naked and whatever the opposite of naked is.

The model in my brain for this ‘significant’ other would even out all of these differences. There would be just her. When I looked at her my perception would transcend the physical; my eyes would see light reflecting off her epidermis, but my brain would see the model of my beloved, everything she is, and is to me. Everything that was and all that will be.

Which means I won’t notice that she changed her hair.

Meanwhile, Nathan, the new delivery guy at her work has no such model. He sees her once a day for 100 seconds. So of course this dick notices that she’s wearing a different shade of eyeliner today. Casanova cunt face.

And that’s just swoon-city for bitches. They’ve got Mr. Notices Everything delivering the goods and Mr. Oblivious at home seemingly unaware of the minor facial tweaks taking place.

It won’t take much of this before her giney tingles every time Prince Perception walks through the door, and hey presto you’ve got yourself an affair.

* That’s right, I can see the fuuuuutuuuuure.

** Comes to pass? That sounds wrong. I recently learned that I’ve been using ‘benevolent’ incorrectly. Oppositely, in fact. Which explains why verbal attacks on my enemies hadn’t been landing with quite as much force as I had hoped.

*** Not my lovely words.